Meaningless

She walked into my MEANINGFUL life, 

changed its MEANING 
and then left me, 

...now my life is so MEANINGLESS - MM

Enlightenment

Happiness cannot be found through great effort and willpower,
but is already present, in open relaxation and letting go!
Don't strain yourself, there is nothing to do or undo.

Whatever momentarily arises in the body-mind
has no real importance at all,
has little reality whatsoever.
Why identify with it,
& become attached to it,
Passing Judgement upon it and ourselves?

Far better to simply
let the entire game happen on its own,
springing up and falling back like waves
without changing or manipulating anything
and notice how everything vanishes and reappears,
magically, again and again, time without end.

Only our searching for happiness,
prevents us from seeing it.
It's like
a vivid rainbow which you pursue without ever catching,
or a dog chasing it's own tail.

Although peace and happiness
do not exist as an actual thing or place,
it is always available
and accompanies you every instant.

Don't believe in the reality
of good and bad experiences;
they are today's ephemeral weather,
like rainbows in the sky.

Wanting to grasp the ungraspable,
you exhaust yourself in vain.
As soon as you open and relax
this tight fist of grasping,
infinite space is there -
open, inviting and comfortable.

Make use of this spaciousness, this
freedom and natural ease.
Don't search any further
looking for the great awakened elephant,
who is already resting quietly at home
in front of your own hearth.

Nothing to do or undo,
nothing to force,
nothing to want,
And nothing missing.

Emaho! Marvelous!
Everything happens by itself.

- a poem by Venerable Lama Gendun Rinpoche

Glamorization of breakups

Breakup has become such a “normal” thing that people start preparing themselves mentally for a breakup even before they start a relationship. Switch on the radio and every third song (if not second) is about separation. Look around you and you will realize you hardly know anyone who has never been through breakups/separation.

There are innumerable websites providing advice to people on breakups. There are even manuals available  “how to breakup”! Then there are some general post breakup rules.  One such rules is “Don’t talk to your partner for at least 6 months after the breakup, stop yourself even if you feel like contacting your 'EX'”! 

As you can see without having any clue about the kind of relationship, length of relationship, problem in the relationship or the feelings of people involved in a relationship, they provide you with a sure shot formula for ruining any relationship, which is indifference!

Why there is no guide on ‘how to get back together after a breakup’?

Why no advice about forgiveness, compassion, acceptance?

Why is that piece of advice often missing from these “BREAKUP PORTALS”?

 

I don’t want to suggest here that no matter what happens, however your partner treats you or however you feel with your partner, you should just stay with him/her and breakups should never ever happen, but what I want to say is that breakups are being projected as CULT thing and this is contributing significantly in breaking up even those relationships which could have normally actually worked.

It is very important to understand that people are different and often do make mistakes. Conflict or temporary separation does not mean that things can never work out between two people. It does not always mean breakup and move on.

The problem with human mind is that it never accepts as long as there exists an option and with the so called “normal” option of breakups, people are not willing at all to accept the imperfections in their partner. “Each one of us is imperfect”, the sooner we realize and accept this, the better it is for the world but unfortunately people keep judging themselves and others. This creates a loop of “breakups” and “moving ons”!

As each relationship is so very different, I feel generalized advice is grossly unfair but still I will end this up with a short piece of advice – forgive yourself, forgive your partner, accept yourself, accept your partner, be compassionate, be kind, kill the ego,  go ahead and make your relationship work!

Each time you can hang in through the hard times - the relationship will only get better and stronger!

Cheers!!!

Don't break my heart!